Well, this past week I was looking down into the holler toward Webb’s Creek thinking about how this month marks the wonderful 12th year anniversary since my very last yard sale. That last sale actually started out as a “garage” sale, but since considerable amounts of assorted junk overflowed into my yard it was officially promoted to “yard sale.” Every piece of merchandise was appraised and assigned a “sale” price. I don’t know what it says about our pricing or the quality of our items, but a ten dollar bill tendered at our cashbox could purchase enough stuff to fill the bed of a pick-up truck.
I always dreaded that moment in the Spring when my wife would announce that we were having our annual sale. It set in motion a terrible chain of events that can best be described as a labor intensive exercise in futility. Our 2.5 car garage became a little shop of horrors filled with borrowed card tables and clotheslines drooping with the weight of old unwanted apparel. You could buy a pair of ice skates for a quarter and a never-used electric foot massager for one dollar (negotiable). It always took two weeks to prepare for the event and then two months afterwards I was still moving around large boxes of old shoes to find my lawnmower.
Professional yard sale customers are savvy business people. They travel the neighborhoods scouting out sale balloons on mailboxes, conduct newspaper research and analyze potential yards for deals and junk quality. Moving sales are typically ranked at the top of the hierarchy followed by multi-family group sales. Folks holding those year-long or even life-long yard sales are ranked very low. Seriously, if you can’t sell your merchandise in months you should at least consider that there might be some issues with your stuff. There just may not be a market for a cracked kitchen sink or a Barbie doll short one leg.
Yard sale pro’s typically show up many hours before the sale begins. Such “early birds” set up camp on the street anxiously awaiting the moment when the garage door slowly opens and the dawn’s early light exposes the hidden “treasures” to the world. Only such an elite yard sale professional could negotiate an unopened jigsaw puzzle from 30 cents down to a nickel. Those guys are good!
Throughout our long history in America yard sales have played a key role in transferring junk from one household to another. If everyone spent just a few dollars at a yard sale this week our economy would jump-start and the Dow average would skyrocket. Housing prices would increase again and consumer confidence would rise to new levels. When politicians talk about change… understand they are only describing what you need in your pocket to visit a yard sale. Change you can spend! We simply can’t wait for the banks to free up money. Yard sales are needed more than ever before. Go ahead and have one or attend a big one this summer.
On August 6-9 a 654 mile-long yard sale will be conducted from Ohio to Alabama along highway 127. It runs right through the heart of Tennessee. There is a second by second countdown to the sale on its own website (google 127 corridor yard sale). The Alabama governor has officially declared the yard sale as one of the state’s top ten annual events. Number nine is getting a red pop and a moon pie at the gas station…just kidding.
I admit that temptation does stir in my soul when I drive by a multi-family yard sale event. After all, I can always use another pipe wrench or a box of national geographics. My guess is that the electric foot massager that I sold over a decade ago is still traveling the yard sale circuit and still demands a premium price because it has never been opened. Offer seventy five cents and demand that they include the Yahtzee game. That is just how it looks from my log cabin.
John LaFevre is a local speaker and co-author of the interactive national park hiking book series, Scavenger Hike Adventures (new: Shenandoah National Park/Summer 2009) Contact John at scavengerhike@aol.com. Artist G. Webb illustrates the national book series and lives in Pittman Center, Tennessee. Gwebbgallery.com.
